Bananas don’t grow in the arctic tundra. Not naturally. The environment doesn’t support it. Nobody thinks this is absurd. Nobody I know is perplexed by this. It’s not natural therefore it’s not expected.
Ever hear someone complain about the out-of-control banana crop in Greenland?
In nature, if the environment doesn’t allow for it, it isn’t going to be able to thrive.
Bananas do great in India. Recent data suggests they’re the world’s largest exporter of the popular fruit. Not only are bananas nutritious but they also double nicely as a telephone. They thrive in India, and many other nations, where the climate is suitable.
Yes, modern agricultural science allows for some latitude on what can be grown where. Mostly though, it seems the difference isn’t what’s growing but the environment it draws its life from.
Now let’s consider that person that keeps getting under your skin. (It could easily be an object or thought.)
Despite your long-suffering, they just don’t get it.
They don’t: ______
understand
see it the right way
listen
think
feel
trust
try
care enough
want it badly enough
know when to stop
believe
Or maybe it’s you. Maybe the behavior (or lack of) is thriving because of the environment. If it’s true for bananas, it may be so for you and me. Perhaps we’ve created the perfect soil for this invasive crop to take root. Maybe we’re watering it with our silence. Maybe it’s nourished by the warmth and light of our tolerance.
Maybe what’s being produced is exactly what you should expect when given all the right elements.
A person is probably more complex than a banana. And I’ve seen people grow into something more when placed in the right environment with the correct measure of influences.
If you don’t like what’s growing, do something about it. But don’t just look down at the person you wish would be different and build your case against them. Look at the environment they’re existing in. Then look at yourself. Especially if you’re the one charged with farming the land. It might be the plot you put them in and continue to support, even if you don’t realize it.
“But I’m not the one who planted them. I’m not the one controlling their actions, either.”
You’re right on both counts. But that’s also true of the banana, isn’t it? Somebody other than you may have planted it. You definitely aren’t the banana. But it still can’t thrive if the environment won’t have it.
You don’t have to manage what you don’t tolerate.
If something is able to thrive, there’s a reason for it.
If things are bananas, you might consider investigating the growing conditions.
